The letter to Charlotte

Hey, how are you these days? Lots of times I miss you and the life in Colorado. Back to home is sweet but sometimes makes me sad. After became an IFYE, I know i'm changing, but I also know I have to take all my attention, or the change will be a bad change. It's hard to understand what I say I know. Today another IFYE wrote on facebook, he said he is change, he has to know how to join in 4h club and the live here(in Taiwan, we all just back home) again, he doesn't know how to do, but just tr to be a good change.

I don't know why another IFYE the can be very proud and said " America( or another country) change my life!" after their IFYE life, I can't do this. They are happy to go abroad and happy to back home; I am happy I went to Colorado but still have lots of stuff I need to think.
Lots of time here I think" is it ok to do this?" "how to do something excellent? how to make me a perfect girl, like other IFYEs they are so good?"

These words I think maybe just you can understand? I think I 'm very nervous about the new life here, cause I was an IFYE, all people think I "have to" be competent, they hope I am very different or able to do hard things. But I just myself, I can't do so mach "have to."

hope you are good there:) I'll try my best to adapt to my new life.

***

Seriously, sometimes I really sad that I back to Taiwan. In Colorado I just a kid, I like a white paper, I can easy to be a good girl, making friends with others. But here, people hope me, or I hope myself, to do something different. I don't know how to change, just know I need to change.